In 1998, Daniel Wallace wrote a novel which was later adapted into a movie by Tim Burton. It begins this way: “In telling the story of my father’s life, it’s impossible to separate fact from the fiction, the man from the myth, the best I can do is to tell it the way he told me, doesn’t always make sense but that’s what kind of story this is.”

The name of the book made into movie is Big Fish: A Novel of Mythic Proportions. It’s the story of a son who doesn’t know what to make of his father’s tall tales but as his father is dying discovers the truth of an unconditional love that brings about reconciliation between the two. Sometimes a reading from Scripture, or a particular story about someone in the Bible, including Jesus, doesn’t always make sense but that’s what kind of story it is. A part of today’s Gospel reading reminded me of Big Fish.

Today’s passage in its entirety is pretty long – and contains enough material for at least three if not four sermons. It was several days after the crucifixion. Jesus has already appeared at least twice to the disciples in the upper room, breathed the Holy Spirit into them and commissioned them to carry on his work. BUT instead they were down by the water, doing what they had done before he called them into discipleship….they were on the boat fishing…and not doing very well at it. Jesus called to them from the shore, told them to fish on the other side of the boat and they had a miraculous catch of fish. There’s a sermon about trust and abundance in there somewhere.

Then they came onto shore and found that Jesus already had a fire going, grilling a little fish and bread (as a southerner I picture catfish and hushpuppies or cornbread), and Jesus offered them the hospitality of a shared meal and intimate conversation. There’s a sermon about the Eucharist in there for sure.

And then there is the part about Peter who ended up being on the receiving end of another kind of grilling from Jesus. Jesus asked Peter the same question three times. The question had nothing to do with doctrine or belief. Jesus didn’t ask, “How come you just went back to work as if nothing had happened? He asked Peter, “Do you love me?” At first we might think ‘what was that all about, it doesn’t make sense?’

Now remember that only a few days ago before the crucifixion, Peter had been in the courtyard of Caiaphas, the High Priest. There was a fire going in the courtyard and Peter stood nearby, warmed his hands, tried to see what was going to happen to Jesus. And three times he was questioned by three different people with something like: “Aren’t you with the guy from Nazareth?” And three times Peter answered “No, no and I don’t even know the man.” In those moments Peter was into self-preservation mode, protecting himself from being arrested or worse.

So here was Peter, once again standing by a fire and being asked three questions, a rather ironic situation which may have passed over his head. If I were Jesus I might have said something like “Thanks a lot Peter for denying me. Some friend you were. What do you have to say for yourself? “ But instead Jesus asked Peter, “Do you love me?”

In the little book Chicken Soup for the Soul Celebrates Mothers, Christie A. Hansen wrote about how her four-year-old daughter taught her about love. They had a little game they played. The mother would fix the little girl’s hair and say, “I love you.” The girl would respond, ‘I love you.’ The mother would say, “Oh yeah, well I love you more.” Then the girl would say, “I love you the most.” And the game would be go on expanding the love more and more: I love you more than a volcano. I love you more than bubble gum. I love you more than television. The mother would usually end the game with, “I love you more than the universe,” because it was hard to one-up that enormous love. But one day the mother could see the little girl really thinking, not wanting to give up. She looked her mother in the eyes, and with a very soft voice said, “I love you more than I love myself.”

The scripture says Peter got irritated because Jesus asked him three times, “Do you love me?” Instead of berating him, Jesus offered Peter a chance for redemption, forgiveness, reconciliation. Each time Peter answered, “Yes, I love you,” Jesus responded by saying “Feed my sheep” or “tend my lambs.” Rather than grinding Peter into the ground for his mistakes, Jesus built him up by giving Peter work and purpose….that mattered. The way to love Jesus was to love others more than self. The way to show love for Jesus was through caring for those that Jesus loved. Jesus called Peter, appointed Peter, to be a servant leader of the new community that was in the process of being formed. And the main requirement was a love that went beyond self.

Today we sang at the gospel, “You have come down to the lakeshore seeking neither the wise nor the wealthy, but only asking for me to follow….you need my hands, my exhaustion, working love for the rest of the weary –a love that’s willing to go on loving.” In our own time the Living Christ asks that same question of us. “Do you love me?” Do we love others enough, more than ourselves, to follow a way of life begun over two thousand years ago by a small group of people who were so affected by the radical teachings and life of one man that they continued his mission and ministry through sharing their resources and caring for others?

Isn’t this the question on people’s hearts and minds when they come to our door: “Do you love me?” Do you love me regardless of where I come from? Do you love me if I don’t have much to offer? Do you love me if I don’t dress in beautiful clothes? Do you love me if I am different? What can we say to answer that question so many different people have asked in subtle ways? Our society teaches us to relate to one another as strangers but Jesus' call to us is to "love one another as I have loved you."

Loving others more than self is a tricky thing to be sure because sometimes people have been so oppressed by circumstances or other human beings that they can hardly love themselves, much less love others more.

When I was in the 11th grade in Ocala Florida, I was Vice President of the Anchor Club, a girl’s club. I was also in charge of the annual skit the club was putting on. Another member of the club, who I admired greatly but who did not get a lead role in the skit, started to snub me and spoke about me in scathing tones. I was crushed and spoke to my English teacher, our club advisor. She wrote me a note, which I still have today. The basic message of the note: You are loved and loveable. We all need to hear those words, “You are loved.” Don’t ever underestimate the power of saying “I love you.”

My youngest daughter and I play that “I love you more game.” Every time we talk to each other we end our conversations this way: She says, “I love you mom.” And I say, “I love you more.” It doesn’t matter if I have irritated her to the nth degree or she has pushed me to my last nerve, we still say it. She is one of those people who finds it hard to love herself. I would be less than honest if I didn’t say I don’t know if she loves me more than herself or if I love her more than myself, but at least in the saying of it, we acknowledge that it is love, the need to hear it spoken, the need to live it out, that is at the heart of our relationship. Never undervalue the power of saying, “I love you.”

Hopefully the church is a place where we speak to others, treat others as beloved sisters and brothers in this world, where each of us is somebody, each of us matters, and each of us know we are loved and lovable.

Following Christ does not require a Phd, a stellar education, a genealogy connected to royalty, or a mistake-free background. What is required is a commitment to doing the best you can, the best I can, to show the love of Christ through servant leadership. Meaning and purpose and serving others bring ever so much more happiness and contentment than the accumulation of all the wealth in the world.

At the end of Big Fish the son finds out that indeed his father exaggerated his tales but he also finds out that his father underplayed his own role in many acts of kindness which enabled others to lead whole and healthy lives. He loved beyond himself.

In telling the story of the life of Jesus, which sometimes makes sense and sometimes doesn’t, the best we can do here on Route 212 is to tell it the way it’s been told to us, to do our best to live out our part in it, and to the best of our abilities love Jesus by loving others more than ourselves…and never, never, never be afraid to say, “I love you.”